Under One Roof (Pilot)

Wednesday, April 16th, 2008 at 10 PM

MyNetworkTV

Under One Roof, Season 1 - Pilot

Why Even Bother?

Flavor Flav stars in a new original comedy on MyNetworkTV. Flavor Flav plays Calvster Hill, an ex-convict that moves in with his wealthy, conservative brother, Walter (Kelly Perine). Calvster subsequently turns the Hill family’s life upside down, parading his old prison cronies through the house; teaching his nephew Walter Jr. to be a gangsta rapper; and butting heads with Walter’s snooty wife, Ashley. (MyNetworkTV.com)

Manatee: I would like to present you with a few questions on last night's episode of Under One Roof.

1) Why?

2) Why?

3) Did MyNetworkTV buy the sets, costumes, pilot script, and opening theme from the 1990 series, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air at a 75% discount?

4) Who made the decision that Walter (Kelly Perine) should play the character gay?

5) What was up with all the man on man prison jokes?

6) Never thought that another sitcom this winter could be worse than Fox's The Return of Jezebel James... I was wrong. (I know this is not a question, but cut me some slack, I spent 22 minutes of my life watching MyNetworkTV last night).

7) Why?

8) And lastly, how, why, in what world do I live, that this show needed an acting coach? (Note: See end credits)

Miss/Guided (1.6 & 1.7)

Thursday, April 3, 2008 @ 8pm

Miss/Guided – Season 1, Episode 6 – “High School Musical”

A short-sighted Bruce (Chris Parnell) assigns Becky (Judy Greer), who is the least creative faculty member on campus, to direct the school's high school musical.

Miss/Guided – Season 1, Episode 7 – “Frenemies”

Unaware that Becky has eyes for Tim (Kristoffer Polaha), Lisa (Brooke Burns) confides in Becky that her divorce is final and seeks her advice about dating. Meanwhile, Becky intervenes in an unconventional manner when Bruce fives a rebellious student (guest starring Rumer Willis as Shawna) six months' detention for pulling the fire alarm.

Get her, Ray! (ABC)

Marmot: If this show doesn't come back, I'll be sad.

Manatee: Me too. I'm not really sure I liked the 2nd of last night's episodes as a season finale... not sure if that was part strike related or just mid season scheduling. I could use some more Miss Guided!

Marmot: It was a little odd. The musical episode would have been a better season finale. I think this is a great show for ABC, and television could definitely use more quality comedies.

Manatee: All next season's comedies will be BBC remakes, so I like the idea of ABC having as trong original comedy with a FANTASTIC lead actress.

Marmot: She is that indeed. Since we obviously yield power over the television (we did destroy The Return of Jezebel James), shall we formally invite ABC to bring Miss/Guided back in the fall, with a full 22 episode order?

Manatee: Yes.

The Return of Jezebel James (Canceled)

Special report: The Return Demise of Jezebel James


Our Prayers have been answered! Hollywood Reporter is reporting:

"Fox drops 'Jezebel'"

Fox has pulled the low-rated sitcom The Return of Jezebel James from its schedule. The network yanked episodes off Friday nights, effective this week. Last Friday's 8:30 p.m. episode failed to improve on its time-period premiere, earning a 1.4 rating among adults 18 to 49. James was paired with repeats of " 'Til Death," which was also removed from the lineup. Instead, Fox will air repeats of Bones."

The Return of Jezebel James (1.3)

Friday, March 21st, 2008 at 8:30 PM

FOX

The Return of Jezebel James , Season 1 - Episode #3- "Needles and Schlag"

Marmot: The Return of Jezebel James is an abomination

Manatee: I'm going to be honest, I'm not sure I can watch it anymore.

Marmot: I don't think so either. It's too painful. I thought of all the other things I could have done with those 22 minutes - eat, read, stare into space

Manatee: I don't even laugh - not even smile. It's the most annoying show!

Marmot: I could have rearranged my cupboards, hit myself repeatedly with a soft but heavy object...anything would have been better. I don't understand how something can be that bad.

Manatee: How did an exec see that and say, “Yes I want that on my network!” Even Emily's Reasons Why Not got pulled after 1 episode. I mean, I know there was a strike and all, but repeats of New Amsterdam would have been better.

Marmot: Agreed. Why doesn't FOX just rerun another episode of House? They don't seem to have any problem doing it any other time.

Manatee: I suppose I could go into every single thing that was dumb, stupid, & unfunny about this show, but we'd be here all day. I might as well just attach the script for those who missed the airing, see for yourself how bad it is.

Marmot: Or you could tell people to beat themselves over the head with a frying pan repeatedly. You walk away with roughly the same effect.

Manatee: What do you think the chances are that it will get picked up for a 2nd season?

Marmot: About the same as an unpopular President getting voted in for a second term despite extreme suspicion surrounding the legitimacy of his first election. Good. It is FOX, after all. They gave Til Death a second season.

Manatee: I want to write Parker Posey a fan mail letter asking her, for the love of God, to quit the show, to use her talents for good not evil, to be in my little sister's high school play (since she will apparently sign up for anything; plus it would have to be better than this show).

Marmot: Ohh, what is Manatee High doing this year?

Manatee: Footloose

Marmot: That's exciting. Is she playing the Sarah Jessica Parker role? Or the Dianne Wiest role? Who is on Return of Jezebel James.

Manatee: Nah, I think we could just use her as an extra.

The Return of Jezebel James (1.1) & (1.2)

Friday, March 14th, 2008 at 8 & 8:30 PM

FOX

The Return of Jezebel James , Season 1 - Pilot & Episode #2 - "Frankenstein Baby"

The 2 most unlikeable Characters... ever (Fox)

Marmot: What did you think of Jezebel James?

Manatee: Here are my thought son TRoJJ: (I don't even know where to start!) I have never hated a show more, not even the Canterbury's Law pilot. Parker Posey does not belong on crappy sitcoms. She is way too talented; and she has never been worse than on this show. She belongs in edgier indie films. Nothing about this show was believable or honest. It was phony and way over the top. It was staged like a bad high school play. The sets looked like my 5 year old brother built them (if I had a 5 year old brother).

Marmot: How did Parker Posey get trapped in this show? Is she being punished for something? The whole cast is talented, really. Lauren Ambrose, Dianne Wiest... It's almost like they had all sold their soul to the devil, and he picked the same time to collect from them all.

Manatee: I agree. Their talents are wasted. Is it the writing? The directing?

Marmot: The writing is just...atrocious. Which is odd, since it was written by Amy Sherman-Palladino who wrote created Gilmore Girls. Not that I was a fan of that show, but it was on for 7 or so years, so it had to be somewhat decent, right?

Manatee: The writing was bad, the acting was insanely bad, production was bad (I think I spotted a camera in the shot once) and it did not change from the pilot to the 1st episode. It's just a terrible show. I really don't like sitcoms, which I guess is for another conversation, but I never understood why you can't have a sentimental moment, why is it cheesy and corny joke central?! Maybe Amy Sherman-Palladino should have redefined the "Sitcom" or else make it a single camera comedy, or something more in the vain of an Ugly Betty... you might have gotten more out of the actors.

Marmot: The actors and the characters. Those sisters are two of the most unlikeable people on television. I don't understand why, when Gilmore Girls was something different and interesting, she would regress to this formulaic, ancient multi-cam sitcom style. There are a couple of things different from the pilot to the second episode, though.

Manatee: Such as?

Marmot: One, Parker Posey inexplicably moved from her house, which had an extra bedroom to the World's Biggest Loft, which requires her soon-to-be pregnant sister to walk up and down a staircase with no railing to get to her bedroom. And two, Parker Posey dropped the Ed Grimley-style act for the second episode. The one that was so prevalent in that horrible, horrible scene in the doctor's office. Honestly, that should go down as one of the worst scenes ever to be shown on television.

Manatee: The OBGYN scene was bad... for being a big kids' book editor, I feel like she was lacking some smarts. She was pretty dumb, and not like lacking common sense... just stupid. I want to know what Fox is thinking this mid season? Why are they creating so many bad female characters? They have made a few now that either lack personality completely or they act like "a guy." Did we not learn anything from that movie "The Sweetest Thing" - girls who act like guys don't sell. It just does not work. Sarah is sleeping with a guy, comes up with all these "no strings" rules, is a great business person, has a nice loft, but is a complete moron! Why can't a woman be a strong woman?! Why do they need to have guy traits... totally unrealistic.

Marmot: I don't get her relationship with that guy either.

Manatee: He (Scott Cohen) is terrible! What bad delivery - a fish would be a better casting choice.

Marmot: What kind of a fish?

Manatee: You're asking me to be witty... hmmm, maybe an aholehole?

Marmot: That's a good one. It would be interesting if it was a goldfish, too. Not like the annoying one on American Dad, but a real one that had a memory span of 3 minutes. The worst thing about Jezebel James? It is the EXACT same plot as a Tina Fey/Amy Poehler movie coming out in April called Baby Mama. Except Jezebel James isn't funny.

Manatee: How do you think this show will effect the opening of that film?

Marmot: Approximately none.Does anyone even know this show exists? I think we're the only two people to watch it. Err, animals.

Manatee: Haha, I'm not sure what the ratings were, but it's not good when the network puts you on a Friday night. Who watches TV on Friday nights?!

Marmot: Old people. Kids. Us.

Manatee: Per Futon Critic’s reporting: "The Return of Jezebel James" (households: 2.2/4, #12, half-hour: N/A; adults 18-49: 1.0, #T10, half-hour: N/A), a second episode of "The Return of Jezebel James" (households: 2.3/4, #11, half-hour: N/A; adults 18-49: 1.0, #T10, half-hour: N/A)

Marmot: #12? As in its timeslot?</FONT>

Manatee: #12 on the night, # 1 was a night time "Price is Right" (CBS won the evening).

Marmot: There was a "Price is Right" special on? How does a show that I didn't even know was on beat this?