Gossip Girl (1.13)

Monday, April 21st, 2008 @ 8 PM

CW
Gossip Girl – Season 1, Episode 13 – “The Blair Bitch Project”

Having been recently dethroned as Queen Bee in the last episode by Gossip Girl, with an assist from scheming "little J" (Taylor Momsen), Blair (Leighton Meester) hesitantly returns to school with the support of her BFF, Serena (Blake Lively). Meanwhile, Serena struggles to adjust to her new living arrangements with her future step-brother, Chuck (Ed Westwick), while receiving disturbing packages from an unknown sender. Jenny's drive to be popular hits an all-new time high when she does something illegal to fit in with her new Upper East Side friends. (CW.com)

Send in the clowns. (CW)

Marmot: It's a lot different than LOST.

Manatee: It is A LOT different than Lost, but really, how different is it from 90210? Besides the location, it's the same show.

Marmot: Just replace The Peach Pit with Butter. So, as an outsider, I had no idea what was going on. First, why was the guy from Panic at the Disco in the blonde's bathroom? And why was in a suit with the door closed and the shower going? That's going to make him sweat, which would destroy his cool outer demeanor.

Manatee: But you loved it right? I was counting down the months, the days till this show would be back on, and I must say, I was not disappointed. Well, even though you only missed 13 episodes, it probably feels like a 100. It's a total soap opera with many crazy story lines. Panic aka Chuck was in Sabrina's bathroom in his school uniform to tick her off. You see they are new step siblings. Basically all you need to know on Chuck is that he is a douche. A douche with a lot of money.

Marmot: I don't know if "loved it" is entirely accurate. It's not terrible, and I'll definitely watch it again. I just kind of hate all of these characters as people. Except for Chuck.

Manatee: The only one I really like is Dan and maybe his Dad. He throws a mean party. But the rest are rich a-holes. That has always been a criticism of the show, the unrelatable characters. It's never bothered me before... maybe because TV is entertainment; it's not always "life." If I wanted realistic I'd watch CNN or Discovery Health. Sometimes I just want to sit for 60 minutes and not think, just enjoy an hour of complete debauchery.

Marmot: Which one was Dan? John Mayer?

Manatee: Yes.

Marmot: Here's something else I was wondering. Why do all the boys at this "high school" wear a uniform, but the girls wear clown costumes?

Manatee: I love the costume designer. I think he is so inventive and creative. It's not just fancy clothes; there is a real look to it, even if you want to call it the circus look. It was a weird episode for you to come in on too, but in a way a good one. I could tell that it was the 1st one back from the strike - there were a few side characters that just disappeared and a few new ones appear and act like they belong there (maybe some casting dilemmas). It did not feel like a continuous flow from the last episode in January to now. It seemed like the start of a fresh season. If I were them, I'd just keep shooting and air through the summer. This is one of those shows that could use the momentum behind it.

Marmot: I didn't feel completely lost watching it last night. I kind of liked coming in midway. I may have missed some storylines, but getting to piece it all together made it a little more engaging. One thing I was wondering, is this a school for gifted kids, rich kids or both? Because all of their dialogue is way beyond what most kids can handle nowadays.

Manatee: I think just for rich kids, some fancy private school in the Met. But Mayer is there on a scholarship because he is smart and wants to go to Dartmouth.

Marmot: Wait, if it's a high school, why are they drinking out at clubs all the time? Does no one card in NYC?

Manatee: That's a good question. I think when you have so much money, you just slip the waitress a $100 and she serves you. Daddy's credit card can go a long way. Basically all these kids do bad things and their parents bail them out financially. There was a whole episode about that, where the kids went swimming in New Amsterdam's pool because one person has a key. A kid dies (or almost dies) and then the head mistress of the school says if the culprit does not come forth something bad will happen. Boy does Dan worry. But the thing is, no one else sweats because mom and dad can pay their way out, but not Dan. So you see all these 14 and 16 year old kids misbehaving 21st century style in Manhattan. I mean the story does not work if it's Podunk, Oklahoma you know?

Marmot: So will their adventures suffer in a recession?

Manatee: I doubt it. It's old money. I'm sure their grandkids will be able to party without worry, too.

Canterbury's Law (1.6)

Friday, April 18th @ 9pm 

Fox

Canterbury’s Law – Season 1, Episode 6 – “What Goes Around” (Season Finale)

"Vote Martin for President 2008"

A vindictive Deputy Attorney General Williams builds a case against Elizabeth, impaneling a Grand Jury and executing search warrants in his effort to prove that she broke the law while defending accused child murderer Ethan Foster. Elizabeth is in the dark at first, but when Russell and Chester get wind of Williams' vendetta, they refuse to let her shutter Canterbury & Associates. Meanwhile, a terrified and unprepared Molly mounts her first defense; and after an important university faculty event, the gulf between Matt and Elizabeth becomes heartbreakingly apparent. (Fox.com) 

Manatee: It was interesting that Cant law pulled a Law & Order - ripped from the headlines - Friday night.

Marmot:  Which headline was that?

Manatee:The one where the alcoholic sends an apology letter to a woman from college whom he raped some 15 years prior (because of his AA) and she has to open old wounds, and her family finds out, and then she calls the cops. http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/2007-03-15-UVA-sex-attack_N.htm

Marmot:I'm glad you told me that, because i was giving them way more credit than they deserved for coming up with that story

Manatee: It was a pretty popular story this winter, and quite interesting and unique... how could you think for a second they came up with that out of plain air?

Marmot: Yeah, that was pretty dumb of me.  I'll say this, some of this episode was not entirely terrible.  And by some, I mean 2 scenes

Manatee: I agree. It definitely wasn't the worst. One problem right off the bat with that story was this: The girl lackey says, "I thought we did not rep rapist?" I'm sorry in episode # 2 did Liz not defend a sex offender (who we saw last week get off the list)? In that episode he was accused of being a pedophile!  And he was on the list for sleeping with his underage girlfriend! Huh? What's with the double standard or the world's worst memory?

Marmot:  Elizabeth Canterbury defends whomever will bring her the best ratings. If its a pedophile, or a rapist, or a couple of teenage girls accused of murdering their friend, than so be it.

Manatee: Why bother bringing up that point now? I think we get it. Don't need lackey # 56789 to point that out in the series finale.... uhhh did I say series, I meant season.  Molly, I think that's her name, is so flip floppy / wishy washy. One week she wants to defend Liz against allegations that she was immoral in court, and the next she wants to quit due to some alcoholic rapist... do I smell Season 2, Molly was raped by her college boyfriend and that's why she becomes suicidal and Liz and Russell have to talk her down from the edge in the opener?

Marmot: I would hope that Russell would just give her a little push. You know, just help her a little. I think the real story this episode is where was Martin?

Manatee:  Bahamas.

Marmot:  But why? That's what I want to know. Why does their intern suddenly go to the Bahamas? This is the interesting story here.  Not the rapist, not the slums

Manatee: I think Season 2 should follow Martin in the Bahamas, and all the wacky things that happen to him, like Weekend at Bernie's the series.

Marmot: Like he gets framed for murder for killing his boss? Weekend at Canterbury's?

Manatee: Smells like a spin-off to me!

Marmot: The other thing of course was the B-story in this episode - 

The blue suede shoes.

Manatee: Not enough air time in my opinion.

Marmot: They should get their own spin-off.

Manatee: What do you think about the fact that for 6 episodes we have been bashed over the head with the missing child thing, and I finally realized last night, would Liz not be pounding down the police station doors asking for answers, asking for them to reopen the case? Would she not ask Frank to investigate? Would she not do her own investigation? Put an image on a milk carton?  I mean, she is a high power attorney, doesn't that carry some weight? Talking about it is one thing, but acting is another... and Liz seems proactive, so why the character flaw? Why doesn't she try (Besides that half ass psychic attempt early on)?

Marmot:  It seems to me that she would have put her practice on hold to find her son. It does seem like a half-hearted attempt on her part. Maybe this is a story they were planning on exploring down the line.  Thank god this was the last episode of this show. I don't think I could take many more of these.

Manatee: Ditto.

Under One Roof (Pilot)

Wednesday, April 16th, 2008 at 10 PM

MyNetworkTV

Under One Roof, Season 1 - Pilot

Why Even Bother?

Flavor Flav stars in a new original comedy on MyNetworkTV. Flavor Flav plays Calvster Hill, an ex-convict that moves in with his wealthy, conservative brother, Walter (Kelly Perine). Calvster subsequently turns the Hill family’s life upside down, parading his old prison cronies through the house; teaching his nephew Walter Jr. to be a gangsta rapper; and butting heads with Walter’s snooty wife, Ashley. (MyNetworkTV.com)

Manatee: I would like to present you with a few questions on last night's episode of Under One Roof.

1) Why?

2) Why?

3) Did MyNetworkTV buy the sets, costumes, pilot script, and opening theme from the 1990 series, Fresh Prince of Bel-Air at a 75% discount?

4) Who made the decision that Walter (Kelly Perine) should play the character gay?

5) What was up with all the man on man prison jokes?

6) Never thought that another sitcom this winter could be worse than Fox's The Return of Jezebel James... I was wrong. (I know this is not a question, but cut me some slack, I spent 22 minutes of my life watching MyNetworkTV last night).

7) Why?

8) And lastly, how, why, in what world do I live, that this show needed an acting coach? (Note: See end credits)

New Amsterdam (1.8)

Monday, April 14th, 2008 at 9 PM

FOX

New Amsterdam, Season 1 - Episode 8 - "Love Hurts"

"This Little Piggy Went to the Fish Market."

"Still recovering from his recent gunshot wound, John and Eva investigate what looks to be the drowning death of a young woman. The victim's death may be related to a string of robberies of wealthy men linked to a dating service. While on the case, John has flashbacks of his life in the 1920s, when he was a grifter and stole a precious diamond pendant from his lover. John also questions if Sara is "the one" who will make him mortal, and as a result, begins to pull away from her. He doesn't want to hurt her by being untruthful about his past and the quest to find his soulmate." (Fox.com)

Marmot: Now that New Amsterdam is finally over, what are we going to suffer through on Mondays?

Manatee: I think I might have a little hole in my heart where New Amsterdam has been. But it will quickly be filled with the return of Gossip Girl next week!

Marmot: How funny, Johnny Amsterdam has a hole in his heart, too. From where a bullet went through it.

Manatee: Maybe I can just fill it. Maybe I'm the one!

Marmot: You need to get to New York quickly. Because as we've learned, the guy hasn't gone further than Queens in 400 years.

Manatee: True, but if it's really me, we'll find a way to get together. I don’t travel so well.

Marmot: That's something I've been wondering. What if he found The One, but she was already married? Or a lesbian? Or what if he never found her because she lived in Seacaucus?

Manatee: I think the answer is simple: It's a TV show, they'll make it work. Though I'm not sure yet what to make of the last scene. Did he break up with the Doctor because they finally realized she is a terrible, unattractive actress? Or because they want to give Season 2 a potential mystery - find another woman (or man) who is the one from the subway or he has to win her back?

Marmot: I couldn't figure out why he broke up with her either. If it's because she kept begging him to come back to bed instead of googling murder suspects, well that's hardly worth kicking her to the curb over. Maybe that's why he is still alive, because he has Seinfeld-like pickiness.

Manatee: I don't know the motivation behind the dramatic pre-family weekend break-up. Cold feet? All I know is that was the best scene of the night: finally breaking up with the douche bag doctor. I mean come on, even at the end she still did not believe he was 400 years old. Though I'm not sure how seriously John took it to prove it to her (besides dying 2X and coming back alive, and having weird Native American blood)... show her the Times Sq. photos, or the old pictures of himself? I mean he must have proved it to other lovers in the past, they believed he was immortal. What would it take to convince you that someone was immortal and not just a con artist?

Marmot: You would think that as a woman of science, she would have at least considered the lack of hits when she Googled him as a possibility that he may actually be 400 years old. He even has Omar to back up his story. And if you can't believe a bar tender, who can you believe?

Manatee: I felt a lacking of effort on both parties' part (John and Doctor).

Marmot: Poor John Amsterdam. Sixty-four girlfriends and none of them are The One.

Manatee: Is that really so bad? Would you prefer to be a 400 year old Virgin?

Marmot: Only if you want to die eventually. I would think that after 400 years, you'd just want to get it over with already. But that brings up another question: can he die? Little things like gunshots and stabbings don't seem to phase him, but what he was decapitated? I hate to geek out on you here, but even Wolverine can be killed if you cut his head off or burn him alive or something like that. If I was John Amsterdam, I would either be trying to off myself or just pretend that the next girl that came along was The One.

Manatee: Interesting idea. What if he put himself in a guillotine? Maybe the blade would malfunction... like fate makes it not happen. Like fate made the bullet miss 2 inches to the left.

Marmot: Ok, what if he was strapped to a nuclear bomb? Or taken into space and then pushed out the window with no spacesuit. These are story lines I feel the writers should explore.

Manatee: It certainly would make it more exciting!

Marmot: For reals. Why isn't he solving crimes in space? There is a huge lack of space detectives on television.

Manatee: You're giving away good ideas!

Marmot: Oh you're right. Let it be known that Space Detectives and all related characters, ideas and ancillary rights are the property of Marmot & Manatee Destroy TV Enterprises.

Canterbury's Law (1.5)

Friday, April 11, 2008

Fox

Canterbury’s Law – Season 1, Episode 5 – “Trade-Off”

“The seriousness of the indictment as well as her probable disbarment and imprisonment finally hits Elizabeth, who tries to cut a deal and get her affairs in order. Russell, Chester and Molly have a different plan, and behind Elizabeth's back, begin mounting a surprising defense, one that involves Deputy Attorney General Zach Williams, Elizabeth's prosecutor. Will Canterbury & Associates be able to save their most important client yet?”

Russell and The Flunkies contemplate their lives after after the firm shuts down and decide to start a band called Russell and The Flunkies.

Marmot: What the hell happened in this episode?

Manatee: I was going to ask you the same thing! It was a confusing story line. It almost seems like the editor cut out an important scene; not that I want to blame the editor... but could the writers really forget entire scenes.

Marmot: Maybe it didn't get copied when the scripts were distributed. Somewhere in a production office there's a scene which ties together the entire Canterbury's Law mythology.

Manatee: There were lots of little points I'd like to discuss, but looking at the overall big picture, the story was just too dull and boring. None of the secondary story lines held my attention, but then again neither did the main story. It seemed to be all these scenes that they wanted to write throughout the season thrown into one episode haphazardly. It answered some questions, but left others unanswered. It was not a though provoking hour of TV or even an entertaining and enjoyable one.

Marmot: No, it was more just obnoxious than anything else. It did feel like a whole season's worth of storylines were thrown into this one episode. I guess there was so much paper flying around, that would explain why they lost that scene.

Manatee: I thought it was a little crunched dealing with getting Liz off, her potential divorce or just general disolving of her marriage, and a new client (which in the long run would get her her deal). It was too much for the second to last episode.

Marmot: I'm still a little unclear on what happened at the end with Fedora.

Manatee: Me too. Are the charges against Liz dropped? Did she get the deal she asked for (with 2 years of jail time)? Are they going to charge the real guy that burned down the building or just let the incident go? And why would Russell take a bullet for Liz? Why would he sacrifice himself when he is a partner in the firm and Liz made a decision part way thru to close the office without discussing with him? Why do her underlings want to work for her? Personally I have not seen anything great come out of her. She's no "The Practice" Lawyer.

Marmot: I agree. I thought it was interesting that she decided to sell her house and move and close her firm, both without telling her partner in them, respectively. They reacted in two very different ways as well.

Manatee: I just don't like her character. And I don't like the characters around her. I don't understand why anyone does anything they do. There is no emotion for me attach to. I don't feel bad for her that she might go to jail - I'm not rooting for her, but neither am I rooting against her. For a main character, I should be doing one or the other. And rooting against her would not be the worst thing to happen to TV.

Marmot: I am rooting against her. This is what I want to happen. Her husband leaves, and she goes to jail. Russell also goes to jail. The two flunkies start their own detective agency. That leaves no one but Martin, and he now runs the firm, and then fights Fedora in court, winning the fedora.

Manatee: I just want to see her get hit by a car. Is that mean to say? Fedora creeps me out. He slaps his asst on the ass (which prompts the question, did he do that with Russell too, hence Russell's hasty exit from the AG's office). Then he has the authority to strike someone off the sex offender's list?! Now that is scary.

Marmot: It's ok to say you want her to get hit by a car, because she doesn't exist. Just don't wish it upon real people. Maybe Fedora took his own name off of the sex offender list, and that's why he can just go around slapping the ass of his assistants. He goes on the list, comes off the list, goes on the list, comes off. It's a vicious cycle.

Manatee: What do you think about two main characters (Fedora and Liz) who are both unlikeable? Is there anyone to like on the show? I don't like Aidan Quinn's character, nor Russell, not Martin for sure, not even Fedora's asst!

Marmot: I actually like Martin. I wish this was his show, and the flunkies worked for him. But to answer your question: no. There are no likeable characters on this show, New Amsterdam, or in any other live action FOX show that I can think of.

The Office (4.9)

Thursday, April 10th, 2008 at 9 PM

NBC

The Office, Season 4 - Episode 9 - "Dinner Party"

NBC

Michael stages an elaborate plan to finally get Pam and Jim over to his and Jan's place for a dinner party. Jim gets trapped into it and agrees to go. Dwight overhears and wants his invitation, too. Michael says he only has six wine glasses and with Andy and Angela going too, there's not enough room for Dwight. (NBC.com)

Marmot: Loved this episode.

Manatee: I thought it was a great episode! So hilarious!

Marmot: Another example of a "smaller" episode - almost all of the action took place in one location, and a small cast: most of the cast members weren't in the episode.

Manatee: Speaking of location, I loved that they left the office, and the show still works. It was a nice change to see them out of work and at a new set.

Marmot: I agree. It's been a while since we've seen Michael's house, too. Interesting to see what's happened to it.

Manatee: So true... the candle room was funny. The change in locale also gave the characters an interesting dynamic, and allowed for a funny moment with Dwight's former babysitter!

Marmot: That was so uncomfortable. Especially when he left her at the bus stop.

Manatee: Her and her retro cooler!

Marmot: It was awesome. A great episode.